Musings from the Moonroom

Thoughts on Art, Inspiration, Creativity and Spirit


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Standing at Water’s Edge-Chapter 10 (Final)

Coping With Disengagement and Reentry

In this final chapter, Dr. Paris explains the causes of disengagement and moving through disengagement. You’ll recall that disengagement is what happens when we come to the end of creative immersion. It can be a positive or negative experience.

Causes of Disengagement

Dr. Paris describes seven factors that cause disengagement: external interruptions, running out of energy, problems or stumbling blocks, emotionally threatening artistic content, waiting, feeling overexposed, and criticism.

External Interruptions

External interruptions are those breaks that result from demands of time on your schedule. This basically refers to those demands known as family, grocery shopping, laundry, caring for our parents, taking pets to the vet, parent-teacher conferences, and so on. You know, that thing called life that demands your time and that puts an artificial end to your immersive experience.

These interruptions are frustrating. We’ve all experienced them. We’ve all complained about them. And one of the best ways to work with these interruptions is to set boundaries when possible, set a schedule when possible, and accept that life happens.

Running Out of Energy

Another factor that causes disengagement is simply running out of energy. While creative immersion is energizing, it can also be emotionally and physically tiring. How often have you found yourself working in a creative flurry, losing track of time, and eventually realizing that you haven’t eaten all day. Or maybe you’re functioning on just a few hours of sleep.

When your physical and psychic energy runs out, disengagement is forced upon you. You.simply.must.stop.

How can you keep from running out of energy?  You can stop at a point in the day where you are clear about the next step and can reenter the immersive phase with anticipation rather than apprehension.

Problems or Stumbling Blocks

Disengagement also happens when you run into a problem or hit a block in the artistic process. Have you experienced this? You’re working along, in the flow, and then you run into a problem. The once fluid relationship suddenly becomes frustrating. Maybe the problem causes you to feel inadequate or that you’ve lost control.

This is a defensive engagement, according to Dr. Paris, because we fear that our underlying fears of inadequacy will be confirmed if we continue to struggle with the project. It is during this type of disengagement that alternative forms of support (relationships, spirituality, etc) are essential.

Emotionally Threatening Artistic Content

Sometimes, disengagement happens when “the content of the artistic piece becomes too threatening.” That is, creating art may raise fears because the piece is an expression of deep emotions. When the artist fears becoming overtaken by his/her emotions, fears humiliation due to exposure, or needs to integrate this experience, the artist may need to disengage from the creative process.

Often an artist emerges from this experience transformed, but the breakthrough can be disturbing and frightening.

Waiting

Waiting; waiting for feedback, waiting for an answer. Whatever we may be waiting for, it leaves us in a vulnerable state. When we’re waiting, support from others again is critical. It is essential not to withdraw from others during this form of disengagement.

Feeling Overexposed

This form of disengagement results when creative types suddenly realize that they have “opened and revealed their core self to others” in their art. In this situation, you suddenly realize that you’ve let down your “self-protective shields.” And then we may panic because we feel helpless to protect ourselves from the audience.

Our relationship with our audience and our past experiences with our audience will directly influence how we react in this situation.

Criticism

This final cause of disengagement is a biggie. Negative feedback and criticism can cause an immediate end to creative immersion.

In an immersive experience, we feel connection to the artwork, we feel perfection. And then someone interrupts that connection with a negative comment and our “perfect union” with the art is shattered. We ask ourselves “Is what they said true?” “Is there something wrong with what I’ve done?” We may begin to doubt ourselves, lose trust in ourselves, and doubt our work.

Though Dr. Paris did not address the handling of criticism, I’m sure she would stress, once again, the importance of having a support network during this time.

Moving Through Disengagement

Our experience during disengagement and our ability to reengage with our artistic work depends on several factors:

Understanding How We Lost the Connection

When disengagement happens, we need to understand how we lost the connection with our artistic work. Here Dr. Paris refers back to the causes of disengagement described above and provides a detailed explanation of what an artist can do once we understand what caused the lost connection.

Understanding and Empathic Others

As creative types, we understand that aloneness is a great barrier to creativity. Dr. Paris defines “aloneness” as “aloneness in one’s inner world; that world where we experience breaks or fractures in our sense of self.” As she has reiterated throughout this book, it is essential that creative types have support networks where we can share our experiences with others. This support can come from loved ones, close friends, peer groups, online communities, and therapy.

Availability of Other Immersive Realms

When we experience disengagement, turning to other immersive experiences can be beneficial in restoring our energy and courage. As Dr. Paris explains: “Sustaining the creative process involves a continuous movement in and out of immersive states and realms. When disengagement occurs in one realm, immersion into a different realm can restore and strengthen the artist so he can reenter.”

Understand Your Underlying State of Self

There are two schools of thought on the “nature of the state of self.” One says that our experiences in childhood determine our strengths and weaknesses and that this is fixed and static. The other says a person’s self-state is determined by the current context of relationships.

Either way, artists bring a certain set of fears and coping responses to every artistic endeavor.

Acceptance

In a nutshell, experienced artists recognize and accept their individual tendencies and patterns. Recognizing and accepting these tendencies when it comes to immersion helps us accept times of disengagement.

Conclusion and Guides

Final disengagement comes at the moment of artistic completion. Here the gratification of perfect expression, reflected in the artwork, is the artist’s barometer of success. Following the experience of gratification, we begin to disengage from the artwork. The final disengagement is what allows us to sell our artwork and move on to our next creation.

If we experience a good relationship with our artwork, disengaging from it when it is completed is often easier. However, if our relationship with the artwork was difficult, disengagement from the artwork may be painful or avoided completely.

Dr. Paris offers two final guides:

1. Understand the type of disengagement you are experiencing, and

2. Stop pressuring yourself to reengage. Understand the reason for disengagement first.

At the end of the book, Dr. Paris includes an appendix of sentence prompts that focus on fantasies, self-perception, fears, and support structures. These prompts may be used to help creative types understand these areas on a deeper, more meaningful level.

Book Outline

Standing at Water’s Edge is divided into three parts with 10 chapters as follows:

Part 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 2: The Light and Dark of Immersion

Part II: Relationships
Chapter 3: The Need for Others
Chapter 4: Finding Strength in Mirrors
Chapter 5: Finding Inspiration in Heroes
Chapter 6: Finding Comfort in Twins
Chapter 7: Connecting with the Audience and Meeting Deadlines

Part III: Stages of the Creative Process
Chapter 8: Approaching Immersion
Chapter 9: Diving In
Chapter 10: Coping with Disengagement and Reentry


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Standing at Water’s Edge-Chapter 9

Diving In

This second to last chapter of Dr. Paris’s book is devoted to the fourth and final stage of the creative process; what she refers to as Taking The Plunge. At this stage creative types feel as ready as they’ll ever be to immerse in a creative project. I think the quote from Van Gogh that opens this chapter sums up the situation:

I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart.

In this stage, creative types feel that they have prepared enough and have no preparation at all. We are filled with hope, yet terrified.

This immersive state might last a few minutes, a few days, or several weeks. Like any intimate relationship, our relationship with our art form ebbs and flows. Some days we experience an immediate connection with the art and jump right into the immersive experience. On other days it is like pulling teeth as immersion comes in bursts and fits.

And like those relationships with people, our art can make us feel confident or insecure. The relationship we have with a particular piece of work can affect the quality of our immersive experience. I’m sure you’ve experienced that lack of connection with a piece; the one that just isn’t coming together, the one you have to walk away from for a period of time, or maybe you trash it outright.

Our ideal immersive state is one of bliss, where we feel everything coming together and are fully engaged with our art. More often, however, we experience a “process of destruction-creation” where we must give up notions of control and independence in order to become intimate with the artwork. Interestingly children do not go through this process. They immerse in creativity and play more easily than adults because they haven’t experienced rejection and disappointment and have less need to control.

Therefore we must remind ourselves to approach immersion with a sense of play.

Crafting

Dr. Paris ends this chapter with a brief mention of a special type of immersive state she refers to as “crafting.” Crafting is defined here as the rehearsals, rewrites, and revisions. In other words, the problem-solving process or refining of the creation. During this state we may experience our work as brilliant one moment and then completely worthless in the next moment.

I think this is the stage where I try to remind myself not to judge the piece too harshly. I have to remember to not call it ‘ugly’ or to say “I don’t like the way this is going.”

Guides

Dr. Paris offers one important guide at the end of this short chapter: PLAY! To play in the moment and to play with your chosen medium.

Join Me

I invite you to join me as I read Standing at Water’s Edge. You can purchase the book through Amazon, Dr. Paris’s web site, or perhaps find it at your local library or bookstore. My goal is to post every 7-10 days a summary of the chapter and share any a-ha moments that occurred. I welcome your comments on this and successive posts. Share your a-ha moments and experiences while reading the book. You can join in at any time. If you have a blog and are also writing about your experiences with this book, please include a link to your blog in your comment. I’ll include your blogs at the end of my posts.

Book Outline

Standing at Water’s Edge is divided into three parts with 10 chapters as follows:

Part 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 2: The Light and Dark of Immersion

Part II: Relationships
Chapter 3: The Need for Others
Chapter 4: Finding Strength in Mirrors
Chapter 5: Finding Inspiration in Heroes
Chapter 6: Finding Comfort in Twins
Chapter 7: Connecting with the Audience and Meeting Deadlines

Part III: Stages of the Creative Process
Chapter 8: Approaching Immersion
Chapter 9: Diving In
Chapter 10: Coping with Disengagement and Reentry


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Standing at Water’s Edge: Chapter 7

Connecting with the Audience and Meeting Deadlines

The final chapter in the section on relationships deals with the artist’s relationship with the audience. Dr. Paris starts this chapter with the following sentence:

The difference between artistic self-expression and creating a work of art is engagement with the audience. In creating a work of art, the artist is reaching out for the audience, attempting to convey or communicate feeling, experience, or idea. The artist is hoping to touch the audience in some way, to elicit a certain kind of response from them.

And the nature of our engagement with the audience throughout the creative process is largely determine by what perceptions we have about the audience. Such perceptions can include what they need and want and their expectations. Are they appreciative, approving, admiring? Or are they critical, hostile, withholding?

Where do these assumptions come from? From our previous experience and encounters with audiences. Positive experiences cause us to anticipate future positive responses; likewise a poor experience will cause us to anticipate that the next audience will also be critical. And when the experience was negative, we may stop our creative process or deny that the audience’s response matters at all.

This reminds me of the belief that if you’re rejected, the problem isn’t you; the problem is with the audience, the jury, the gallery owner. While this may be true in many cases (e.g. your contemporary art isn’t a good fit with a country theme show), we still take this rejection personally on some level.

In addition to our previous experiences with audiences, our assumptions about what to expect with and from others can be traced back to childhood.  According to Dr. Paris, new research on parent-infant interaction suggests that the way parents relate with their child forms the child’s prototype of relationships throughout life. That is, early interactions with parents organizes the child’s assumptions about what to expect from others. So a child who has regular and frequent moments of shared enthusiasm with his/her parents comes to expect this response and feels safe enough to allow immersion with others.

If our original interactions with others involved feelings of rejection or dismissal, we have the potential to develop more positive interactions but only if we understand how our reflexive positions help to re-create and maintain old patterns.

Dr. Paris also briefly discusses “parallel identities” where a child/adult is secure in his/her artistic relationships but insecure in his/her personal relationships. This often occurs when a child begins artistic expression and performance at a young age, develops confidence while performing, but cannot transfer those same feelings to personal relationships.

Maintaining Self

“The ultimate challenge in engaging with an other…is retaining our own sense of self while still responding to the needs of the other.”

Here Dr. Paris refers to our ability to maintain a balance with our audience. Do we concern ourselves with self-preservation, that is “I do what I do and the audience can like it or lump it.” Or do we only meet audience demand, that is “What I do is only as valuable as the audience’s response to it. I must give them what they want.”

While we may bounce from one extreme to the other, as creative types we cease to be truly creative if we merely fulfill a formula for audience approval. This belief can be applied to more than just a creative, immersive experience. Consider how you feel if you do anything in life just for someone’s approval.

Deadlines

How we deal with deadlines depends on several factors, including how we experience boundaries, especially those imposed by others and how a deadline is presented. Imposed deadlines can feel inhibiting; they become something to resist and rebel against. If the “deadline-imposer” is perceived as insensitive or unreasonable, we may feel paralyzed by the deadline. If the “deadline-imposer” offers support, we feel strengthened and supported.

Creating our own deadlines can be a way to reduce resistance. We do not feel at risk of being controlled by an outside force and we may view the deadlines as “helpful containers for our creative process.” Personally, I know I work better with deadlines, whether set by my self or set externally by an other. However, it is often easier to fudge a self-imposed deadline because an external force is not controlling the deadline.

Finally, Dr. Paris states that deadlines can be experienced as incentives; small, bite-sized, manageable chunks that help us remain engaged in the creative process and to fend off overwhelm. A reward along the way (chocolate chip cookies or taking a half-day hike?) or a celebration of your achievement at the end (hot fudge lava cake or a massage?) can’t hurt either.

Guides

Dr. Paris offers three guides at the end of Chapter 7 to help us understand our relationship with audiences.

1. To explore our assumptions about our audience. Make a reality check about your assumptions. Are these assumptions based on past experiences with audiences or based in previous experiences in personal relationships?

2. Set your own deadlines. With externally imposed deadlines, create your own smaller deadlines within the allotted time frame.

3. Break projects down into small chunks. If breaking a project down into manageable chunks isn’t your thing, break the project down into time frames. Setting time limits is another way to contain anxiety. Spend 30 minutes on a task and if you can’t immerse after 30 minutes, call it a day.

Join Me

I invite you to join me as I read Standing at Water’s Edge. You can purchase the book through Amazon, Dr. Paris’s web site, or perhaps find it at your local library or bookstore. My goal is to post every 7-10 days a summary of the chapter and share any a-ha moments that occurred. I welcome your comments on this and successive posts. Share your a-ha moments and experiences while reading the book. You can join in at any time. If you have a blog and are also writing about your experiences with this book, please include a link to your blog in your comment. I’ll include your blogs at the end of my posts.

Book Outline

Standing at Water’s Edge is divided into three parts with 10 chapters as follows:

Part 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 2: The Light and Dark of Immersion

Part II: Relationships
Chapter 3: The Need for Others
Chapter 4: Finding Strength in Mirrors
Chapter 5: Finding Inspiration in Heroes
Chapter 6: Finding Comfort in Twins
Chapter 7: Connecting with the Audience and Meeting Deadlines

Part III: Stages of the Creative Process
Chapter 8: Approaching Immersion
Chapter 9: Diving In
Chapter 10: Coping with Disengagement and Reentry


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Standing at Water’s Edge: Chapter 6

I apologize for not keeping up on my chapter reviews. The end of show season and upcoming holidays have sent my thoughts elsewhere. But, delay no more, here is the synopsis of Chapter 6.

Finding Comfort in Twins

In chapter 6, the shortest chapter thus far, Dr. Paris concludes her discussion on the three types of relationships that are important for creative types. So far, she has discussed “mirror” relationships and “hero” relationships. In this chapter the focus is on the “twin” relationship. That is, being with “like-kind.”

The twin (or “twinship” as Dr. Paris calls it) relationship is the relationship we have with people who are, essentially, going through the same thing(s) that we are. I’m sure you’ve experienced this type of relationship most often. This is the person who shares our same struggles and feelings.

In the twin relationship, we “connect with others who are experiencing the same things,” we feel “less alone” and freed to be more playful. This relationship also boosts our courage to immerse in creativity, comforts us when we’re stressed, and encourages us when we are filled with self-doubt.

Blocks and Fears

As in the previous two chapters on mirror and hero relationships, Dr. Paris provides examples of blocks and fears that may prevent the development of or the ability to sustain twin relationships.

Absence of Twinship Relationships

As always, we return to childhood, to those early relationships and how they impact our future development. In childhood, our first twin relationships might involve siblings, friends, or peers. Here we experience a sense of belonging. We feel part of a larger group.

Keep in mind that these experiences in childhood do not necessarily revolve around just any peer group. The others must be a good fit with the child’s temperament, physical, and emotional abilities and possibly life circumstances.

Successful early childhood experiences of twinship causes some people to readily seek out and establish these kinds of relationships in adulthood. However, for people who did not enjoy group experiences in childhood, developing these relationships as an adult is difficult. If the now adult person felt painfully different from others as a child, this identity of being different becomes established in adulthood. This leads to fear of exposing his/her “differentness” and subsequent retreat from peer and intimate relationships. And fear of exposure may inhibit one’s artistic endeavors.

Competitiveness

“Competition among peers can be a facilitating or an inhibiting force.”

I can relate to that statement because I hated competition as a child. And that feeling stemmed from a sense that I wasn’t good enough in the particular activity. Because I didn’t often feel a sense of accomplishment or success, it was easier for me to give-up or not try hard enough. You know “what’s the point, I’m just going to lose anyways” or “I’m not good enough.”

In this situation the perceived risk of failing in competition threatens one’s self esteem. It is safer to withdraw from competition than risk “annihilation of self-esteem and self confidence.” This often happens when the goal of the competition is about performance rather than process.

On the other hand, a competitive spirit can propel people to reach beyond their comfort zone. Seeing others take a “successful dive” can strengthen one’s hope that he/she can take a risk and achieve. Here a person may stretch beyond her fears in order to keep up with others.

Guides

This short chapter ends with two suggestions for creating or enhancing the twinship relationship

1. Seek out twinship relationships. Do you have a presence in a twinship group, a group of like-minded people? Consider taking classes, joining an art association or writer’s group.

2. Explore your past history with twinship relationships. Think about your peer groups as a child.

Join Me

I invite you to join me as I read Standing at Water’s Edge. You can purchase the book through Amazon, Dr. Paris’s web site, or perhaps find it at your local library or bookstore. My goal is to post every 7-10 days a summary of the chapter and share any a-ha moments that occurred. I welcome your comments on this and successive posts. Share your a-ha moments and experiences while reading the book. You can join in at any time. If you have a blog and are also writing about your experiences with this book, please include a link to your blog in your comment. I’ll include your blogs at the end of my posts.

Book Outline

Standing at Water’s Edge is divided into three parts with 10 chapters as follows:

Part 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 2: The Light and Dark of Immersion

Part II: Relationships
Chapter 3: The Need for Others
Chapter 4: Finding Strength in Mirrors
Chapter 5: Finding Inspiration in Heroes
Chapter 6: Finding Comfort in Twins
Chapter 7: Connecting with the Audience and Meeting Deadlines

Part III: Stages of the Creative Process
Chapter 8: Approaching Immersion
Chapter 9: Diving In
Chapter 10: Coping with Disengagement and Reentry


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Standing at Water’s Edge: Chapter 5

Finding Inspiration in Heroes

For some reason, the title of this chapter brought to mind various songs about heroes, from Bette Midler’s “Wind Beneath My Wings” to David Bowie’s “Heroes” (yes, that is a rather curious mix and so is our music collection…sans Bette Midler; sorry Ms. M.)

One definition of a hero is a man noted for his special achievements in a particular field. A heroine is defined as a woman noted for her special achievements in a particular field.

Dr. Paris defines a hero as someone we look up to, admire and aspire to please.

As I read this chapter, I wracked my brain trying to recall any heroes from my childhood.

I came up with a blank (parent’s not included.)

This doesn’t mean I didn’t have any heroes during my childhood. I’m sure I did. I guess they just weren’t very permanent.

Dr. Paris explains that parents are often a child’s first hero. This is the person the child depends upon for physical and psychological care. As children (and often into adulthood) we want to please our parents and make them proud of us. As children get older, realization about the parent’s limitations occur. Children start to see their parents as real people, warts and all. (And as adults we often want to blame our parents for those warts that might have been passed down to or otherwise affected us.)

Mentors and teachers are also powerful hero figures in a child’s and adult’s life. In the ideal situation, these relationships not only teach skills but also assist in immersion of the task.

So a hero is someone we look up to and admire and who supports our ability to immerse in creativity by helping us feel safe and secure. When we have a good internal or external connection with a hero, we feel inspired and motivated to move forward.

But what happens when blocks or fears keep us from developing healthy connections with heroes?

Absence and Disillusionment

The first block Dr. Paris discusses is the absence of a parental hero and disillusionment. This typically happens when an idealized figure betrays or neglects us. Sadly, not everyone has someone they admire and respect. This may be due to the absence of a trustworthy person in one’s life or a history of disappointments that lead to deep feelings of distrust.

People are quite creative, however, when dealing with experiences of disappointment. As was mentioned in earlier chapters, fantasy and imagination are often helpful in assisting creative types create safe relationships and thus immersion in a creative process.

Compliance

Another block that impacts healthy connections with heroes is compliance. That is, in the quest to please an admired other, a person sacrifices his/her own individuality for the sake of the relationship. Dr. Paris explains

When the admired person has specific requirements for approval (or is perceived that way), we are forced to choose between honoring the demands and losing the relationship. The importance of the approval of the admired person makes this a very difficult choice, and many of us will choose to comply rather than to risk disapproval or rejection.

Anyone feel like they’ve “lost” themselves lately due to compliance?

One example that comes to mind is my early experiences in starting my business and working with consignment store owners. A store owner might suggest adding a new product to my line. Because I admire this store owner and because I want to make sales, I say “sure” and create the new product even though I grumble the whole time I make the product because I really don’t want to make it. But approval is important and I don’t want to say “no.”

Dr. Paris does point out that not all compliance is bad or that one should never comply.

Compliance can be a gratifying experience when a person chooses to try to meet the needs of another. But it is when we feel that we must always give up our own needs and uniqueness in order to satisfy someone else’s expectations that it becomes toxic to our creative process.

In this respect, compliance becomes a cage that does not allow for the freedom to immerse.

Rebellion and Rage

Here rebellion and rage goes beyond the event of “acting up” or dying your hair purple. In this block, rebellion and rage are by-products of disillusionment and betrayal by others. (See the first block on absence and disillusionment.) Here the individual attempts to regain power and punishes the offender. Their energy comes from a wish for revenge and a need to restore a sense of control and justice.

Interestingly enough, Dr. Paris believes that artistic expression of rebellion or rage indicates that the artist still has hope of being heard, appreciated and understood.

Artists who are inspired to express their disappointment and hurts through aggressive content and form still have enough hope to fight, to vigorously assert their point of view. Their artwork may be the only medium that gives them a voice, enabling them to stand up to others.

Guides

Dr. Paris ends Chapter 5 with three guides to help creative types develop or grow our relationships with heroes:

  • Develop relationships with those you admire. Find a mentor, teacher or admired person (real or fantasy) and connect with that person. With real life figures, ask for advice and feedback. Your ability to ask for support is a sign of strength and will sustain your creative process.
  • Immerse in the work of someone you admire. Read books on or by this person, appreciate his/her art, listen to his/her music.
  • Make use of fantasy heroes. Call upon your hero or idol in fantasy. Imagine meeting your hero. Imagine him/her appreciating your work. Imagine your hero facing creative blocks or procrastination. How would they handle these situations?

Join Me

I invite you to join me as I read Standing at Water’s Edge. You can purchase the book through Amazon, Dr. Paris’s web site, or perhaps find it at your local library or bookstore. My goal is to post every 7-10 days a summary of the chapter and share any a-ha moments that occurred. I welcome your comments on this and successive posts. Share your a-ha moments and experiences while reading the book. You can join in at any time. If you have a blog and are also writing about your experiences with this book, please include a link to your blog in your comment. I’ll include your blogs at the end of my posts.

Book Outline

Standing at Water’s Edge is divided into three parts with 10 chapters as follows:

Part 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 2: The Light and Dark of Immersion

Part II: Relationships
Chapter 3: The Need for Others
Chapter 4: Finding Strength in Mirrors
Chapter 5: Finding Inspiration in Heroes
Chapter 6: Finding Comfort in Twins
Chapter 7: Connecting with the Audience and Meeting Deadlines

Part III: Stages of the Creative Process
Chapter 8: Approaching Immersion
Chapter 9: Diving In
Chapter 10: Coping with Disengagement and Reentry


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Standing at Water’s Edge: Chapter 3

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The Need for Others

The third chapter in Standing at Water’s Edge is a preface to Dr. Paris’s discussion on relationships and the importance of relationships in the creative process. She begins with an interview with Loren Long, a book illustrator. In a nutshell, Mr. Long has an ideal situation: he has a strong connection to his family and his art. His family is a strong support network for him and his art. At the end of the interview, Dr. Paris tells Mr. Long: “I view your lifestyle as a sign of your strength, and I believe that your relationships with your wife and children support and enrich your ongoing capacity to create.”

Not that Mr. Long doesn’t have self-doubt. He does say in the interview “I guess that, in general, I always need someone to like my work. If they don’t, my self-doubt comes to the surface. You know, like I’m not living up to the grand fantasies I have about myself or about what my work should look like.”

I remember feeling that when I first started working as an artist full-time. I wanted everyone to like my art. The reality is not everyone will like your art. And I’ve come to accept that because I certainly know that I don’t like every piece of art I see either. However, as creative types, we all need someone (or several someones) to support us. The support we receive from relationships helps to keep us productive, happy, and energetic.

Dr. Paris sums this up nicely:

Positive relationships help to move us forward and help us to grow. Positive relationships also help the artist along in his creative process. Good relationships can bolster our courage to take the plunge into creativity. And likewise, not-so-good relationships, or a lack of relationships, can inhibit our dive.

I know from personal experience that I excel in the company of community. The year I participated in an art salon, I believe my business excelled because I was making and keeping goals and those in the group kept me on track. Since then I feel like I haven’t done quite as well, nor have I found quite the same support network.

Dr. Paris makes this additional point:

Although most people will agree that relationships are an important part of their life and that relationships help them to feel strong and capable, many people have a difficult time developing and sustaining these supports.

BINGO!

Personally, I believe some of this difficulty comes when people change, move forward or backward, change their focus, become overwhelmed by other factors in life, etc, etc. I do believe in that saying about people coming into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. The hard part is maintaining relationships. It takes effort from both persons.  As Dr. Paris points out Rather than striving to become self-sufficient and independent of others, we must seek to become better at creating gratifying relationships.

In this chapter, Dr. Paris talks a bit about psychology and human behavior and changes in this area over the last two decades. At the end of this discussion, she expresses her belief that creativity is more of a psychological state and process. It requires persistence, resilience, and determination (as various sources on creativity like to point out.) However, Dr. Paris believes that these traits are not a static or given ability. That the capacity to be creative emerges when we feel psychologically strong, safe, and understood by others.

But we all know that we are not all fortunate to have supportive friends, families, and others. So what do you do then?

Imagining Connection

Because of the belief that humans have a natural inclination for connection, it is possible that in the absence of real-life supportive relationships (or in addition to these relationships), imagining this kind of support is beneficial. In other words imagining supportive connections provides us the fuel to continue our attempts at creative immersion and sustains us through the various blocks and fears we encounter along the way.

Okay, I understand this point. I’ve done some visualization tasks, such as before heading off to an art show or before entering a gallery to present my work. And yes, it does give me a boost of confidence. This section also made me think a bit about the Law of Attraction and how visualizing can help bring about that which you desire.

Dr. Paris points out that while many artists are socially isolated or withdrawn, internally we are able to experience connections with others. And we often experience that connection with others through our art.

Before moving on to a discussion of three kinds of relationships, Dr. Paris poses two questions to consider:

What kinds of relationships do you need to facilitate your creativity?

What gets in the way of developing these kinds of relationships?

Join Me

I invite you to join me as I read Standing at Water’s Edge. You can purchase the book through Amazon, Dr. Paris’s web site, or perhaps find it at your local library or bookstore. My goal is to post every 7-10 days a summary of the chapter and share any a-ha moments that occurred. I welcome your comments on this and successive posts. Share your a-ha moments and experiences while reading the book. You can join in at any time. If you have a blog and are also writing about your experiences with this book, please include a link to your blog in your comment. I’ll include your blogs at the end of my posts.

Book Outline

Standing at Water’s Edge is divided into three parts with 10 chapters as follows:

Part 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 2: The Light and Dark of Immersion

Part II: Relationships
Chapter 3: The Need for Others
Chapter 4: Finding Strength in Mirrors
Chapter 5: Finding Inspiration in Heroes
Chapter 6: Finding Comfort in Twins
Chapter 7: Connecting with the Audience and Meeting Deadlines

Part III: Stages of the Creative Process
Chapter 8: Approaching Immersion
Chapter 9: Diving In
Chapter 10: Coping with Disengagement and Reentry


8 Comments

Standing at Water’s Edge-Chapter 2

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Chapter 2: The Light and Dark of Immersion

In this chapter, Dr. Paris shares various scenarios on the struggle of immersion. I love the passage from Joseph Campbell that introduces this chapter:

Destruction of the world that we have built and in which we live, and of ourselves within it. But then a wonderful reconstruction of the bolder, cleaner, more spacious, and fully human life-that is the lure, the promise, and the terror…that we carry within

And so it can be with immersion; a struggle to begin, fear of starting, fear of the unknown, but the promise of a potentially wonderful outcome.

This chapter focuses on artistic blocks and how recognizing and understanding our blocks helps us get past them. And if we don’t recognize the nature of these blocks, we risk staying in a state of being unproductive.

I have to admit here that I still cringe at the word “productive.” The reason being the nine years I spent working as Speech-Language Pathologist. Whether I worked as a therapist for contract companies or whether I worked internally at a specific facility, we were expected to track our hours. Hours spent treating patients, time spent evaluating patients, time spent in meetings, etc, etc, etc. And though I understood most of the rationale for this (e.g. billable time), I couldn’t help but feel like someone was constantly looking over my shoulder. In some ways, it instilled a feeling that we weren’t trusted to do our jobs effectively.

Even today I tend to track my hours in the studio but sometimes I wonder if seeing that time written on a piece of paper contributes to my feeling guilty that I didn’t spend enough time working on my art or if it keeps me from getting started on a project in the first place. You know, because someone is looking over my shoulder checking to see if I’m being productive.

But I digress…..

In this chapter, Dr. Paris shares two examples of artists experiencing blocks and how they dealt with their individual situations (one through therapy, one through addictive behaviors.) But regardless of how these people dealt with their situations, the resolution in both cases revolved around understanding the situation and the significant role relationships play in the process.

It is when we disengage from one immersive experience and have no where else to turn for another immersive experience that darkness can set in. We become vulnerable to this “darkness” which may take the form of loneliness, hopelessness, feeling unsupported, or feeling worthless. The feelings may be fleeting or they may last for a period of time.

I can certainly relate to these feelings. I felt this way when I returned from France this summer. I now realize it was the immersive experience, the sense of community and friendship that made the trip so enjoyable. When I came home, I felt a sense of emptiness, loneliness, and overall blah. This is when I learned the importance of community in my artistic life. That is, connections.

Dr. Paris discusses five symptoms that can result as a lack of immersion and lead to blocks:

  • anxiety and restlessness which leave one feeling lost and without direction (yep, felt that one)
  • distrust and paranoia; lack of trust in the self and in others (sure, sometimes I don’t trust my self, my ideas out of fear of failure)
  • underachievement; that is, it is safer not to immerse and risk failure (yep, related to that one)
  • numbness and social isolation when the vitalizing effects of immersion are not present (makes me wonder if working in a home studio contributes to social isolation)
  • anger, aggression, and violence; connections with other detached and angry persons can lead to aggression

So many lightbulb moments here!

This chapter concludes with a section titled “The Light” and this sentence seems to sum it all up:

We know what we need: to feel special, to feel safe, to feel understood, and to feel connection.

In the guides section, Dr. Paris outlines three points:

  1. To be aware of and respect the fears you are facing. To take a deeper look at what fears you are facing. Awareness of these fears is the first step in stretching beyond them.
  2. Understand your dread to repeat. Here is where you want to identify previous experiences of disappointment, failure, etc and how you coped. Then identify moments of success. Together our memories of disappointment, failure, and success contribute to our fears, dreads, and hopes.
  3. Reach out for support. When you disengage from creativity, turn to other relationships or activities for immersion.

Join Me

I invite you to join me as I read Standing at Water’s Edge. You can purchase the book through Amazon, Dr. Paris’s web site, or perhaps find it at your local library or bookstore. My goal is to post every 7-10 days a summary of the chapter and share any a-ha moments that occurred. I welcome your comments on this and successive posts. Share your a-ha moments and experiences while reading the book. You can join in at any time. If you have a blog and are also writing about your experiences with this book, please include a link to your blog in your comment. I’ll include your blogs at the end of my posts.

Book Outline

Standing at Water’s Edge is divided into three parts with 10 chapters as follows:

Part 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 2: The Light and Dark of Immersion

Part II: Relationships
Chapter 3: The Need for Others
Chapter 4: Finding Strength in Mirrors
Chapter 5: Finding Inspiration in Heroes
Chapter 6: Finding Comfort in Twins
Chapter 7: Connecting with the Audience and Meeting Deadlines

Part III: Stages of the Creative Process
Chapter 8: Approaching Immersion
Chapter 9: Diving In
Chapter 10: Coping with Disengagement and Reentry


3 Comments

Standing at Water’s Edge-Chapter 1

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Standing at Water’s Edge: Moving Past Fear, Blocks, and Pitfalls to Discover the Power of Creative Immersion by Anne Paris, Ph.D, arrived on the scene in 2008 and became an instant hit and highly recommended among many artists. Paris is a “clinical psychologist who specializes in helping artists and other creative people reach their potential.”

I remember reading an excerpt online in 2008 and being instantly drawn to the book. I received it as gift later in the year and promptly put it on my bookshelf. This often happens with the many books I want to read. Buy them, shelve them, sometimes forget about them, and eventually read them.

I believe, however, that a book comes to us, or we remember it and read it, when we need it. Such is the case with this book.

After witnessing some curious messages from the universe last week, I remembered this particular book, pulled it off the shelf and read the sleeve. Then I sat down and read the introduction. The introduction alone hooked me and I started reading the book in earnest late last week.

My intention is to share with you my learnings and a-ha moments as I read the book. If you’re feeling stuck, dealing with fear (of failure, of success, of getting started, of moving forward, etc), or struggling with blocks to creativity, I think you’ll enjoy this book and hopefully find it beneficial.

Chapter One: The Challenge of Immersion

In this chapter, Anne Paris defines creativity as coming from a state of experience she calls “immersion.”  That is, an experience of total connection and engagement. You know, being “in the flow” or “in the zone.” And we’ve all experienced that. Paris further explains that the experience of immersion can be found in many realms: creativity (artistic expression), spirituality, intimate relationships, play, learning, parenting, and psychotherapy.

As Paris states “It is not the activity, per se, that generates immersion, but the doer’s internal state and engagement that define it.”  However, it can be quite frightening to immerse ourselves in an activity.  Instead, we often choose not to dive in, protecting our vulnerable selves but diminishing our sense of aliveness and connection.

Can you relate to that? Sounds like our friend fear is at work here. In this chapter, Paris also describes several universal fears that block immersion: fear of letting go, fear of loss of control, fear of annihilation, and fear of emotions.

So we have the immersive state, or being in the flow. Then we have fear of immersion due to blocks. The other player in this is what Paris calls “disengagement” or the time when we evaluate our work and perhaps feel threatened by judgment. This is when we are out of the immersive experience, perhaps after we have finished a piece of work. If we feel inadequate during this period, we need to find other sources of immersion, such as play, relationships, and so forth, in order to restore our energy. This, in turn, rejuvenates us and allows us to reengage with our artwork.

At the end of this chapter, Paris offers three guides that summarize the chapter and offer suggestions for working through the challenge of immersion. These include: making immersion the goal, accepting movement in and out of immersion, and engaging in alternative realms of immersion.

I had several a-ha moments when reading this chapter and several pages are marked in red ink with notes and underlining. My most significant a-ha moment, however, came when reading guide #3, engaging in alternative realms of immersion. I have always had some difficulty transitioning back to work after a vacation. In the last couple of years, this has become even harder.

What I realized by reading chapter one is that when I am on vacation, I am totally immersed in the vacation. The end of vacation represents the time of disengagement. It often takes me 2-3 days before I can get my groove back and work in the studio. What I need to do is engage in some other immersive activity that will assist me in getting back into the studio (something other than sitting like a lump in front of the computer, if possible :-))

This realization was like a light bulb going off for me. It has helped me to stop blaming myself for being lazy when this period of disengagement occurs. I’m not being lazy, I’m just working through the disengagement from one immersive experience to re-engagement in another immersive experience.

Join Me

I invite you to join me as I read Standing at Water’s Edge. You can purchase the book through Amazon, Dr. Paris’s web site, or perhaps find it at your local library or bookstore. My goal is to post every 7-10 days a summary of the chapter and share any a-ha moments that occurred. I welcome your comments on this and successive posts. Share your a-ha moments and experiences while reading the book. You can join in at any time. If you have a blog and are also writing about your experiences with this book, please include a link to your blog in your comment. I’ll include your blogs at the end of my posts.

Book Outline

Standing at Water’s Edge is divided into three parts with 10 chapters as follows:

Part 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 2: The Light and Dark of Immersion

Part II: Relationships
Chapter 3: The Need for Others
Chapter 4: Finding Strength in Mirrors
Chapter 5: Finding Inspiration in Heroes
Chapter 6: Finding Comfort in Twins
Chapter 7: Connecting with the Audience and Meeting Deadlines

Part III: Stages of the Creative Process
Chapter 8: Approaching Immersion
Chapter 9: Diving In
Chapter 10: Coping with Disengagement and Reentry


2 Comments

PHEW!

Checking in briefly today. I’m in the midst of final preparations for the Paradise City Arts Festival show on Columbus Day weekend, October 10-12. I’m in booth #733, so stop by and say “hi.”

The past two days have been productive. I’ve got 15 little faces and wings for the Soulful Sprites, plus 15 little stones with words to complete them. I’ve made one small Cat in Striped Pajamas, to go with his big brother, and I’ve made 10 Heart in Hand Talisman which are now waiting for their hands to hold them.

I’ve also completed and sent off my October email newsletter to my collectors. If you’d like to be on my email newsletter list, please leave a comment on this post indicating your interest.

You know, some days you just can’t leave the sculpted heads alone and without supervision. I chuckled when I saw one head appear to give one of the ladies a kiss….

Gimme a Little Kiss

Gimme a Little Kiss

The head in the front right looks a little shocked!

The MRI

No word yet on the results of my MRI. I haven’t received a call from my doctor which means one of two things: either he hasn’t received the report OR he has seen the report and nothing significant was found. I spent about 10 minutes on the phone with his office getting circulated from the front desk to the wrong office, back to the front desk and back on hold. At least they play relatively pleasant music. Unfortunately, I never reached the desired person and hung up. So I submitted an email via their online system.

I can say that my pain has been rather minimal since the MRI. Maybe I just need exposure to large, thudding magnets a couple times a year?

Books

This weekend I started reading a book by Anne Paris, Standing at Water’s Edge. I plan to share a bit more about this book in the next day or two and the a-ha moments I’m already having. I’ve only read the introduction and first chapter and boy is it speaking to me.