I’m half-way through my blog anniversary celebration. I’m having a good time. I hope you are too.
This week, I’m giving away a copy of Debbie Jackson’s lovely book “Polymer Clay Jewelry: 20 Projects Plus Techniques” and one of my Mokume Gane pins.
First, Debbie Jackson’s book:
Jackson’s book is a great resource for the polymer clay beginner, for someone returning to polymer clay, or for anyone interested in using polymer clay to make ethnic inspired artwork. And that is one of the beauties of polymer clay. Versatility!
In the book, Jackson shows you how to create artwork inspired by Asian, African, European, and South American cultures. The projects focus primarily on jewelry such as pendants, brooches, bracelets and earrings. However, you’re a creative being and you can certainly adapt the techniques to other projects such as vessels, home decor, and sculpture.
The techniques you’ll learn in Jackson’s book include: Mokume Gane, building canes, making a push mold, making a Skinner Blend, carving, and using liquid polymer clay. Her step-by-step instructions are detailed and accompanied by clear color photos.
And my Mokume Gane pin:
Mokume Gane Pin
Pin Detail
Along with Debbie Jackson’s book, one winner will also receive this Mokume Gane pin. The pin was inspired by the colors of late fall with hints of Asian design. It measures 5 ” long and would make a lovely addition to any blazer or coat. The Mokume Gane design in the center features copper, gold, and black polymer clay. It is framed by textured black polymer clay and accented with copper Pearl Ex.
I rarely make jewelry anymore so this is truly a collectible piece.
If you’d like to enter this giveaway, just leave a comment on this post sharing one of your favorite sources of creative inspiration and why. Please include an email address when you leave a comment so I may notify you if you win.
Comments will remain open till midnight EST on Tuesday, August 23. The winner will be chosen on Wednesday. Giveaway items will be shipped via USPS and limited to U.S. residents. I apologize for the restriction on shipping.
The winner of this giveaway was Diane S. This giveaway is now closed.
I love almost anything involving the Medieval age and the Renaissance. Old castles, tapestries, religious artifacts, knights, The Pillars of the Earth mini-series.
And then there is the lovely jewelry that adorned some of the women during these time periods. Stunning necklaces of gold and exquisite jewels. Head pieces with precious gemstones and pearls. Even some of the men were adorned with jewels. And if they weren’t wearing them, you might find them holding a jewel encrusted sword.
Following the medieval theme started in my last blog post on Carcassone, this week’s blog anniversary giveaway features Cris Dupouy’s lovely book “Creating Your Own Antique Jewelry: Taking Inspiration from Great Museums Around the World.”
In this book, Dupouy uses select artifacts as the source of her inspiration to create jewelry. Her sources of inspiration span the time periods from Antiquity to the Middle Ages, the Renaissance to the 20th century. For each piece, she provides a brief history, a picture of the artifact (often being worn by the subject in a particular painting), and instructions for recreating the item.
Though Dupouy’s medium of choice in this book is polymer clay & gemstones, it may be possible to recreate the items in a combination of mediums such as polymer clay, metal clay and gemstones or metal clay and gemstones.
Along with Dupoy’s book, you also have the chance to win one of my first art doll necklaces inspired by my interest in the Medieval age.
If you’d like to enter this giveaway, just leave a comment on this post sharing your favorite period piece, such as a movie, mini-series or book and why. Please include an email address when you leave a comment so I may notify you if you win.
Comments will remain open till midnight EST on Tuesday, August 16. The winner will be chosen on Wednesday. Giveaway items will be shipped via USPS and limited to U.S. residents. I apologize for the restriction on shipping.
The winner of this giveaway was Marlea A. This giveaway is now closed.
I am celebrating each Friday in August with a book and artwork giveaway in honor of my blog’s 4th anniversary.
This first Friday I am giving away a copy of Do The Work! by Steve Pressfield and one of my Lucky Sprite sculptures.
Do The Work! book cover
I first heard about Pressfield’s book in Pam Slim’s blog post on creative blocks. Not only did Pam’s blog post strike a nerve, so did her interview with Steve Pressfield where he discussed the content of his new book.
And just what is in Do The Work! that makes me want to give away a copy?
Do The Work! is Pressfield’s manifesto about resistance. Something all creatives face, whether you are an artist, a writer, an engineer, or a teacher. If you work on any type of project, at some point in the process resistance rears its head.
And then what do you do?
I love this quote from the book “On the field of the Self stand a knight and a dragon. You are the knight. Resistance is the dragon.”
In order to defeat resistance, you must slay the dragon. Pressfield gives you simple, direct advice on defeating the dragon.
Do The Work! is a short book, less than 100 pages and can easily be read in one sitting. And those pages are powerful. I’ve read my copy twice and given one copy as a gift. Now I’d like to give one of my readers a copy too.
If you’d like to enter this giveaway, just leave a comment on this post sharing how you deal with resistance. Or maybe you don’t deal with it. Please include an email address when you leave a comment so I may notify you if you win.
Along with Do The Work! you will also receive one of my Lucky Sprite sculptures. Because we can all use a little luck when trying to slay the dragon.
Lucky Sprite
Comments will remain open till midnight EST on Tuesday, August 9. The winner will be chosen on Wednesday. Giveaway items will be shipped via USPS and limited to U.S. residents. I apologize for the restriction on shipping.
This giveaway is now complete. The winner was Linda Easton.
I’m a little late in sharing the good news, but better late than never. Besides, its a good reason to celebrate again.
Last year, I participated in Jennifer Lee’s wonderful online class The Right Brain Business Plan E-Course. This was the first business plan course that I took that actually clicked. Why? Because it paired my creative side with my planning & organizational skills. It made crafting a business plan fun.
If you’re a creative entrepreneur like me, I bet you go running for the hills when you hear the words business plan. Yet, you know that having a plan is essential to your success.
Through Jenn’s online class, and now her book, I was able to develop a vision for my business based on values that are important to me. Those values became the basis for my business plan. With Jenn’s guidance, I was able to identify and understand my perfect customers, make the leap into teaching, write financial goals in terms that made sense to me, and develop a sense of who my creative cohorts are.
The other wonderful aspect of Jenn’s approach to writing a business plan is that I can pick up where I left off. When health issues became my primary focus late last year, I had to put my plan aside. Now that I’m feeling better, it’s time to revisit my plan, update it, and rework some goals. Having flexibility in your business plan is essential. It shouldn’t be a linear, static document.
So, what are you waiting for? The Right-Brain Business Plan has already been a #1 bestseller the Amazon Small Business Plans category. I highly recommend this book!
In this final chapter, Dr. Paris explains the causes of disengagement and moving through disengagement. You’ll recall that disengagement is what happens when we come to the end of creative immersion. It can be a positive or negative experience.
Causes of Disengagement
Dr. Paris describes seven factors that cause disengagement: external interruptions, running out of energy, problems or stumbling blocks, emotionally threatening artistic content, waiting, feeling overexposed, and criticism.
External Interruptions
External interruptions are those breaks that result from demands of time on your schedule. This basically refers to those demands known as family, grocery shopping, laundry, caring for our parents, taking pets to the vet, parent-teacher conferences, and so on. You know, that thing called life that demands your time and that puts an artificial end to your immersive experience.
These interruptions are frustrating. We’ve all experienced them. We’ve all complained about them. And one of the best ways to work with these interruptions is to set boundaries when possible, set a schedule when possible, and accept that life happens.
Running Out of Energy
Another factor that causes disengagement is simply running out of energy. While creative immersion is energizing, it can also be emotionally and physically tiring. How often have you found yourself working in a creative flurry, losing track of time, and eventually realizing that you haven’t eaten all day. Or maybe you’re functioning on just a few hours of sleep.
When your physical and psychic energy runs out, disengagement is forced upon you. You.simply.must.stop.
How can you keep from running out of energy? You can stop at a point in the day where you are clear about the next step and can reenter the immersive phase with anticipation rather than apprehension.
Problems or Stumbling Blocks
Disengagement also happens when you run into a problem or hit a block in the artistic process. Have you experienced this? You’re working along, in the flow, and then you run into a problem. The once fluid relationship suddenly becomes frustrating. Maybe the problem causes you to feel inadequate or that you’ve lost control.
This is a defensive engagement, according to Dr. Paris, because we fear that our underlying fears of inadequacy will be confirmed if we continue to struggle with the project. It is during this type of disengagement that alternative forms of support (relationships, spirituality, etc) are essential.
Emotionally Threatening Artistic Content
Sometimes, disengagement happens when “the content of the artistic piece becomes too threatening.” That is, creating art may raise fears because the piece is an expression of deep emotions. When the artist fears becoming overtaken by his/her emotions, fears humiliation due to exposure, or needs to integrate this experience, the artist may need to disengage from the creative process.
Often an artist emerges from this experience transformed, but the breakthrough can be disturbing and frightening.
Waiting
Waiting; waiting for feedback, waiting for an answer. Whatever we may be waiting for, it leaves us in a vulnerable state. When we’re waiting, support from others again is critical. It is essential not to withdraw from others during this form of disengagement.
Feeling Overexposed
This form of disengagement results when creative types suddenly realize that they have “opened and revealed their core self to others” in their art. In this situation, you suddenly realize that you’ve let down your “self-protective shields.” And then we may panic because we feel helpless to protect ourselves from the audience.
Our relationship with our audience and our past experiences with our audience will directly influence how we react in this situation.
Criticism
This final cause of disengagement is a biggie. Negative feedback and criticism can cause an immediate end to creative immersion.
In an immersive experience, we feel connection to the artwork, we feel perfection. And then someone interrupts that connection with a negative comment and our “perfect union” with the art is shattered. We ask ourselves “Is what they said true?” “Is there something wrong with what I’ve done?” We may begin to doubt ourselves, lose trust in ourselves, and doubt our work.
Though Dr. Paris did not address the handling of criticism, I’m sure she would stress, once again, the importance of having a support network during this time.
Moving Through Disengagement
Our experience during disengagement and our ability to reengage with our artistic work depends on several factors:
Understanding How We Lost the Connection
When disengagement happens, we need to understand how we lost the connection with our artistic work. Here Dr. Paris refers back to the causes of disengagement described above and provides a detailed explanation of what an artist can do once we understand what caused the lost connection.
Understanding and Empathic Others
As creative types, we understand that aloneness is a great barrier to creativity. Dr. Paris defines “aloneness” as “aloneness in one’s inner world; that world where we experience breaks or fractures in our sense of self.” As she has reiterated throughout this book, it is essential that creative types have support networks where we can share our experiences with others. This support can come from loved ones, close friends, peer groups, online communities, and therapy.
Availability of Other Immersive Realms
When we experience disengagement, turning to other immersive experiences can be beneficial in restoring our energy and courage. As Dr. Paris explains: “Sustaining the creative process involves a continuous movement in and out of immersive states and realms. When disengagement occurs in one realm, immersion into a different realm can restore and strengthen the artist so he can reenter.”
Understand Your Underlying State of Self
There are two schools of thought on the “nature of the state of self.” One says that our experiences in childhood determine our strengths and weaknesses and that this is fixed and static. The other says a person’s self-state is determined by the current context of relationships.
Either way, artists bring a certain set of fears and coping responses to every artistic endeavor.
Acceptance
In a nutshell, experienced artists recognize and accept their individual tendencies and patterns. Recognizing and accepting these tendencies when it comes to immersion helps us accept times of disengagement.
Conclusion and Guides
Final disengagement comes at the moment of artistic completion. Here the gratification of perfect expression, reflected in the artwork, is the artist’s barometer of success. Following the experience of gratification, we begin to disengage from the artwork. The final disengagement is what allows us to sell our artwork and move on to our next creation.
If we experience a good relationship with our artwork, disengaging from it when it is completed is often easier. However, if our relationship with the artwork was difficult, disengagement from the artwork may be painful or avoided completely.
Dr. Paris offers two final guides:
1. Understand the type of disengagement you are experiencing, and
2. Stop pressuring yourself to reengage. Understand the reason for disengagement first.
At the end of the book, Dr. Paris includes an appendix of sentence prompts that focus on fantasies, self-perception, fears, and support structures. These prompts may be used to help creative types understand these areas on a deeper, more meaningful level.
Book Outline
Standing at Water’s Edge is divided into three parts with 10 chapters as follows:
This second to last chapter of Dr. Paris’s book is devoted to the fourth and final stage of the creative process; what she refers to as Taking The Plunge. At this stage creative types feel as ready as they’ll ever be to immerse in a creative project. I think the quote from Van Gogh that opens this chapter sums up the situation:
I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart.
In this stage, creative types feel that they have prepared enough and have no preparation at all. We are filled with hope, yet terrified.
This immersive state might last a few minutes, a few days, or several weeks. Like any intimate relationship, our relationship with our art form ebbs and flows. Some days we experience an immediate connection with the art and jump right into the immersive experience. On other days it is like pulling teeth as immersion comes in bursts and fits.
And like those relationships with people, our art can make us feel confident or insecure. The relationship we have with a particular piece of work can affect the quality of our immersive experience. I’m sure you’ve experienced that lack of connection with a piece; the one that just isn’t coming together, the one you have to walk away from for a period of time, or maybe you trash it outright.
Our ideal immersive state is one of bliss, where we feel everything coming together and are fully engaged with our art. More often, however, we experience a “process of destruction-creation” where we must give up notions of control and independence in order to become intimate with the artwork. Interestingly children do not go through this process. They immerse in creativity and play more easily than adults because they haven’t experienced rejection and disappointment and have less need to control.
Therefore we must remind ourselves to approach immersion with a sense of play.
Crafting
Dr. Paris ends this chapter with a brief mention of a special type of immersive state she refers to as “crafting.” Crafting is defined here as the rehearsals, rewrites, and revisions. In other words, the problem-solving process or refining of the creation. During this state we may experience our work as brilliant one moment and then completely worthless in the next moment.
I think this is the stage where I try to remind myself not to judge the piece too harshly. I have to remember to not call it ‘ugly’ or to say “I don’t like the way this is going.”
Guides
Dr. Paris offers one important guide at the end of this short chapter: PLAY! To play in the moment and to play with your chosen medium.
Join Me
I invite you to join me as I read Standing at Water’s Edge. You can purchase the book through Amazon, Dr. Paris’s web site, or perhaps find it at your local library or bookstore. My goal is to post every 7-10 days a summary of the chapter and share any a-ha moments that occurred. I welcome your comments on this and successive posts. Share your a-ha moments and experiences while reading the book. You can join in at any time. If you have a blog and are also writing about your experiences with this book, please include a link to your blog in your comment. I’ll include your blogs at the end of my posts.
Book Outline
Standing at Water’s Edge is divided into three parts with 10 chapters as follows:
In the final section Standing at Water’s Edge, Dr. Paris addresses the stages of the creative process. Chapter 8 focuses on the first three stages: fantasy, contemplation, and preparation. According to Dr. Paris, entry into the creative state is the result of successfully navigating these stages. It is important to note that while the stages are presented in linear fashion in the book, in reality creative types often move back and forth through the stages multiple times. The intensity and duration of each stage varies. Some creative types will pass through each stage every time and others will pass over stages.
Also important to note is that the ability to immerse is different for everyone and may be different for the same person at various times. Some have no difficulty immersing into creativity and others wrestle with immersion. What is important is to realize the nuances and shiftsin yourinternal and external sense of being-in-connection and how these fantasies and actual lived experiences affect your creative process.
Finally, be aware that moving from one stage to the next can cause anxiety and fear because moving into the next phase means moving into the unknown. This is often accompanied by negative feelings about our selves. It is at these transition points that we need the support of others to keep us going.
Fantasy
Fantasies provide the fuel for creativity. Here we draw on previously discussed relationships (greatness, pleasing, admiration, understanding.) At this stage, creative types know what kind of artistic form he/she will use, but the specific idea, feeling, or experience you wish to convey has not been clarified.
With fantasies of greatness and connection, we hope that our work will be seen, understood, and appreciated. As Dr. Paris points out, it has been argued that the creative process is undertaken in an attempt to enhance or heal the self. A second fantasy is pleasing an admired figure; a parent, teacher, or idol. Here we can gain strength, inspiration, and vitality. Finally, the third fantasy driving creativity is being perfectly understood and appreciated. In this fantasy, we hope our expression of creativity will resonate with others.
So the creative process is ignited when artists find fantasies that “supply hope for self-enhancement or self-cures.” This is usually a time of anticipation for artists. Many people, however, never move beyond the stage of fantasy in the creative process. For some, these fantasies are sustaining enough. According to Dr. Paris, if we view fantasies as fertile ground from which to grow, we can rediscover our passions and creative energy. Here we need to reach out to mirrors, twins, and heroes for support.
Contemplation
In the second stage, contemplation, an artist experiences enough support for a specific artistic fantasy that s/he can move forward and actively think about the project. Here we begin to ask questions such as “what will be the content of the project?” “what emotions or experiences do I wish to convey?” The project now takes on purpose and intent. At this point images of the project begin to emerge and we write down these “creative sparks” in sketches and notes. These images reassure us of our ability to experience total immersion in the future.
Ironically, this stage can also feel like avoidance or procrastination! Why? Because this is a time of incubation. A time to sit with the ideas…which often occur when we’re not focused on the project. In this phase of contemplation artists move from fantasy to reality through commitment to the project. A good affirmation during this phase is to say “I am creating a ____” or “I am writing a _____” or “I am painting a ____” in order to give the project life and move it toward concrete action.
Preparation
The third stage, preparation, is an attempt to soothe the fear of the unknown through concrete actions and behaviors that function to keep the project alive. Preparation can take many forms including research or taking care of extraneous tasks like cleaning the house, shopping for groceries, cleaning the studio…sound familiar?
Dr. Paris points out that whether the tasks lead to creative immersion or are stalling tactics of procrastination, it is important to understand that these tactics are reflections of fear, not an indication of weakness or inadequacy or laziness.
The preparation stage also consists of self-evaluation and comparison to others. We may run our idea by another person to see if it has merit. Unfortunately this is the time when we may confront deficits or holes in our talent. Now we realize that we need to take a refresher course in our medium or to take a course in an area outside our medium.
Finally, during the preparation phase, we may immerse our selves in other realms such as spirituality, art appreciation, or intimate relationships in order to be restrengthened and to gain confidence as we immerse in our artwork.
Guides
Dr. Paris offers the following guides to consider as we approach immersion:
Identify your current phase in the creative process and evaluate the usefulness of your efforts during each phase.
Identify and validate the nature of your fears at each transition point. Developing rituals and structures can help with these transitions.
Turn to others for support. If you don’t have a support system at this time, draw on memories of previously supportive others.
Join Me
I invite you to join me as I read Standing at Water’s Edge. You can purchase the book through Amazon, Dr. Paris’s web site, or perhaps find it at your local library or bookstore. My goal is to post every 7-10 days a summary of the chapter and share any a-ha moments that occurred. I welcome your comments on this and successive posts. Share your a-ha moments and experiences while reading the book. You can join in at any time. If you have a blog and are also writing about your experiences with this book, please include a link to your blog in your comment. I’ll include your blogs at the end of my posts.
Book Outline
Standing at Water’s Edge is divided into three parts with 10 chapters as follows:
Connecting with the Audience and Meeting Deadlines
The final chapter in the section on relationships deals with the artist’s relationship with the audience. Dr. Paris starts this chapter with the following sentence:
The difference between artistic self-expression and creating a work of art is engagement with the audience. In creating a work of art, the artist is reaching out for the audience, attempting to convey or communicate feeling, experience, or idea. The artist is hoping to touch the audience in some way, to elicit a certain kind of response from them.
And the nature of our engagement with the audience throughout the creative process is largely determine by what perceptions we have about the audience. Such perceptions can include what they need and want and their expectations. Are they appreciative, approving, admiring? Or are they critical, hostile, withholding?
Where do these assumptions come from? From our previous experience and encounters with audiences. Positive experiences cause us to anticipate future positive responses; likewise a poor experience will cause us to anticipate that the next audience will also be critical. And when the experience was negative, we may stop our creative process or deny that the audience’s response matters at all.
This reminds me of the belief that if you’re rejected, the problem isn’t you; the problem is with the audience, the jury, the gallery owner. While this may be true in many cases (e.g. your contemporary art isn’t a good fit with a country theme show), we still take this rejection personally on some level.
In addition to our previous experiences with audiences, our assumptions about what to expect with and from others can be traced back to childhood. According to Dr. Paris, new research on parent-infant interaction suggests that the way parents relate with their child forms the child’s prototype of relationships throughout life. That is, early interactions with parents organizes the child’s assumptions about what to expect from others. So a child who has regular and frequent moments of shared enthusiasm with his/her parents comes to expect this response and feels safe enough to allow immersion with others.
If our original interactions with others involved feelings of rejection or dismissal, we have the potential to develop more positive interactions but only if we understand how our reflexive positions help to re-create and maintain old patterns.
Dr. Paris also briefly discusses “parallel identities” where a child/adult is secure in his/her artistic relationships but insecure in his/her personal relationships. This often occurs when a child begins artistic expression and performance at a young age, develops confidence while performing, but cannot transfer those same feelings to personal relationships.
Maintaining Self
“The ultimate challenge in engaging with an other…is retaining our own sense of self while still responding to the needs of the other.”
Here Dr. Paris refers to our ability to maintain a balance with our audience. Do we concern ourselves with self-preservation, that is “I do what I do and the audience can like it or lump it.” Or do we only meet audience demand, that is “What I do is only as valuable as the audience’s response to it. I must give them what they want.”
While we may bounce from one extreme to the other, as creative types we cease to be truly creative if we merely fulfill a formula for audience approval. This belief can be applied to more than just a creative, immersive experience. Consider how you feel if you do anything in life just for someone’s approval.
Deadlines
How we deal with deadlines depends on several factors, including how we experience boundaries, especially those imposed by others and how a deadline is presented. Imposed deadlines can feel inhibiting; they become something to resist and rebel against. If the “deadline-imposer” is perceived as insensitive or unreasonable, we may feel paralyzed by the deadline. If the “deadline-imposer” offers support, we feel strengthened and supported.
Creating our own deadlines can be a way to reduce resistance. We do not feel at risk of being controlled by an outside force and we may view the deadlines as “helpful containers for our creative process.” Personally, I know I work better with deadlines, whether set by my self or set externally by an other. However, it is often easier to fudge a self-imposed deadline because an external force is not controlling the deadline.
Finally, Dr. Paris states that deadlines can be experienced as incentives; small, bite-sized, manageable chunks that help us remain engaged in the creative process and to fend off overwhelm. A reward along the way (chocolate chip cookies or taking a half-day hike?) or a celebration of your achievement at the end (hot fudge lava cake or a massage?) can’t hurt either.
Guides
Dr. Paris offers three guides at the end of Chapter 7 to help us understand our relationship with audiences.
1. To explore our assumptions about our audience. Make a reality check about your assumptions. Are these assumptions based on past experiences with audiences or based in previous experiences in personal relationships?
2. Set your own deadlines. With externally imposed deadlines, create your own smaller deadlines within the allotted time frame.
3. Break projects down into small chunks. If breaking a project down into manageable chunks isn’t your thing, break the project down into time frames. Setting time limits is another way to contain anxiety. Spend 30 minutes on a task and if you can’t immerse after 30 minutes, call it a day.
Join Me
I invite you to join me as I read Standing at Water’s Edge. You can purchase the book through Amazon, Dr. Paris’s web site, or perhaps find it at your local library or bookstore. My goal is to post every 7-10 days a summary of the chapter and share any a-ha moments that occurred. I welcome your comments on this and successive posts. Share your a-ha moments and experiences while reading the book. You can join in at any time. If you have a blog and are also writing about your experiences with this book, please include a link to your blog in your comment. I’ll include your blogs at the end of my posts.
Book Outline
Standing at Water’s Edge is divided into three parts with 10 chapters as follows:
Part 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 2: The Light and Dark of Immersion
Part II: Relationships
Chapter 3: The Need for Others
Chapter 4: Finding Strength in Mirrors
Chapter 5: Finding Inspiration in Heroes
Chapter 6: Finding Comfort in Twins
Chapter 7: Connecting with the Audience and Meeting Deadlines
Part III: Stages of the Creative Process
Chapter 8: Approaching Immersion
Chapter 9: Diving In
Chapter 10: Coping with Disengagement and Reentry
I apologize for not keeping up on my chapter reviews. The end of show season and upcoming holidays have sent my thoughts elsewhere. But, delay no more, here is the synopsis of Chapter 6.
Finding Comfort in Twins
In chapter 6, the shortest chapter thus far, Dr. Paris concludes her discussion on the three types of relationships that are important for creative types. So far, she has discussed “mirror” relationships and “hero” relationships. In this chapter the focus is on the “twin” relationship. That is, being with “like-kind.”
The twin (or “twinship” as Dr. Paris calls it) relationship is the relationship we have with people who are, essentially, going through the same thing(s) that we are. I’m sure you’ve experienced this type of relationship most often. This is the person who shares our same struggles and feelings.
In the twin relationship, we “connect with others who are experiencing the same things,” we feel “less alone” and freed to be more playful. This relationship also boosts our courage to immerse in creativity, comforts us when we’re stressed, and encourages us when we are filled with self-doubt.
Blocks and Fears
As in the previous two chapters on mirror and hero relationships, Dr. Paris provides examples of blocks and fears that may prevent the development of or the ability to sustain twin relationships.
Absence of Twinship Relationships
As always, we return to childhood, to those early relationships and how they impact our future development. In childhood, our first twin relationships might involve siblings, friends, or peers. Here we experience a sense of belonging. We feel part of a larger group.
Keep in mind that these experiences in childhood do not necessarily revolve around just any peer group. The others must be a good fit with the child’s temperament, physical, and emotional abilities and possibly life circumstances.
Successful early childhood experiences of twinship causes some people to readily seek out and establish these kinds of relationships in adulthood. However, for people who did not enjoy group experiences in childhood, developing these relationships as an adult is difficult. If the now adult person felt painfully different from others as a child, this identity of being different becomes established in adulthood. This leads to fear of exposing his/her “differentness” and subsequent retreat from peer and intimate relationships. And fear of exposure may inhibit one’s artistic endeavors.
Competitiveness
“Competition among peers can be a facilitating or an inhibiting force.”
I can relate to that statement because I hated competition as a child. And that feeling stemmed from a sense that I wasn’t good enough in the particular activity. Because I didn’t often feel a sense of accomplishment or success, it was easier for me to give-up or not try hard enough. You know “what’s the point, I’m just going to lose anyways” or “I’m not good enough.”
In this situation the perceived risk of failing in competition threatens one’s self esteem. It is safer to withdraw from competition than risk “annihilation of self-esteem and self confidence.” This often happens when the goal of the competition is about performance rather than process.
On the other hand, a competitive spirit can propel people to reach beyond their comfort zone. Seeing others take a “successful dive” can strengthen one’s hope that he/she can take a risk and achieve. Here a person may stretch beyond her fears in order to keep up with others.
Guides
This short chapter ends with two suggestions for creating or enhancing the twinship relationship
1. Seek out twinship relationships. Do you have a presence in a twinship group, a group of like-minded people? Consider taking classes, joining an art association or writer’s group.
2. Explore your past history with twinship relationships. Think about your peer groups as a child.
Join Me
I invite you to join me as I read Standing at Water’s Edge. You can purchase the book through Amazon, Dr. Paris’s web site, or perhaps find it at your local library or bookstore. My goal is to post every 7-10 days a summary of the chapter and share any a-ha moments that occurred. I welcome your comments on this and successive posts. Share your a-ha moments and experiences while reading the book. You can join in at any time. If you have a blog and are also writing about your experiences with this book, please include a link to your blog in your comment. I’ll include your blogs at the end of my posts.
Book Outline
Standing at Water’s Edge is divided into three parts with 10 chapters as follows:
Part 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 2: The Light and Dark of Immersion
Part II: Relationships
Chapter 3: The Need for Others
Chapter 4: Finding Strength in Mirrors
Chapter 5: Finding Inspiration in Heroes
Chapter 6: Finding Comfort in Twins
Chapter 7: Connecting with the Audience and Meeting Deadlines
Part III: Stages of the Creative Process
Chapter 8: Approaching Immersion
Chapter 9: Diving In
Chapter 10: Coping with Disengagement and Reentry
For some reason, the title of this chapter brought to mind various songs about heroes, from Bette Midler’s “Wind Beneath My Wings” to David Bowie’s “Heroes” (yes, that is a rather curious mix and so is our music collection…sans Bette Midler; sorry Ms. M.)
One definition of a hero is a man noted for his special achievements in a particular field. A heroine is defined as a woman noted for her special achievements in a particular field.
Dr. Paris defines a hero as someone we look up to, admire and aspire to please.
As I read this chapter, I wracked my brain trying to recall any heroes from my childhood.
I came up with a blank (parent’s not included.)
This doesn’t mean I didn’t have any heroes during my childhood. I’m sure I did. I guess they just weren’t very permanent.
Dr. Paris explains that parents are often a child’s first hero. This is the person the child depends upon for physical and psychological care. As children (and often into adulthood) we want to please our parents and make them proud of us. As children get older, realization about the parent’s limitations occur. Children start to see their parents as real people, warts and all. (And as adults we often want to blame our parents for those warts that might have been passed down to or otherwise affected us.)
Mentors and teachers are also powerful hero figures in a child’s and adult’s life. In the ideal situation, these relationships not only teach skills but also assist in immersion of the task.
So a hero is someone we look up to and admire and who supports our ability to immerse in creativity by helping us feel safe and secure. When we have a good internal or external connection with a hero, we feel inspired and motivated to move forward.
But what happens when blocks or fears keep us from developing healthy connections with heroes?
Absence and Disillusionment
The first block Dr. Paris discusses is the absence of a parental hero and disillusionment. This typically happens when an idealized figure betrays or neglects us. Sadly, not everyone has someone they admire and respect. This may be due to the absence of a trustworthy person in one’s life or a history of disappointments that lead to deep feelings of distrust.
People are quite creative, however, when dealing with experiences of disappointment. As was mentioned in earlier chapters, fantasy and imagination are often helpful in assisting creative types create safe relationships and thus immersion in a creative process.
Compliance
Another block that impacts healthy connections with heroes is compliance. That is, in the quest to please an admired other, a person sacrifices his/her own individuality for the sake of the relationship. Dr. Paris explains
When the admired person has specific requirements for approval (or is perceived that way), we are forced to choose between honoring the demands and losing the relationship. The importance of the approval of the admired person makes this a very difficult choice, and many of us will choose to comply rather than to risk disapproval or rejection.
Anyone feel like they’ve “lost” themselves lately due to compliance?
One example that comes to mind is my early experiences in starting my business and working with consignment store owners. A store owner might suggest adding a new product to my line. Because I admire this store owner and because I want to make sales, I say “sure” and create the new product even though I grumble the whole time I make the product because I really don’t want to make it. But approval is important and I don’t want to say “no.”
Dr. Paris does point out that not all compliance is bad or that one should never comply.
Compliance can be a gratifying experience when a person chooses to try to meet the needs of another. But it is when we feel that we must always give up our own needs and uniqueness in order to satisfy someone else’s expectations that it becomes toxic to our creative process.
In this respect, compliance becomes a cage that does not allow for the freedom to immerse.
Rebellion and Rage
Here rebellion and rage goes beyond the event of “acting up” or dying your hair purple. In this block, rebellion and rage are by-products of disillusionment and betrayal by others. (See the first block on absence and disillusionment.) Here the individual attempts to regain power and punishes the offender. Their energy comes from a wish for revenge and a need to restore a sense of control and justice.
Interestingly enough, Dr. Paris believes that artistic expression of rebellion or rage indicates that the artist still has hope of being heard, appreciated and understood.
Artists who are inspired to express their disappointment and hurts through aggressive content and form still have enough hope to fight, to vigorously assert their point of view. Their artwork may be the only medium that gives them a voice, enabling them to stand up to others.
Guides
Dr. Paris ends Chapter 5 with three guides to help creative types develop or grow our relationships with heroes:
Develop relationships with those you admire. Find a mentor, teacher or admired person (real or fantasy) and connect with that person. With real life figures, ask for advice and feedback. Your ability to ask for support is a sign of strength and will sustain your creative process.
Immerse in the work of someone you admire. Read books on or by this person, appreciate his/her art, listen to his/her music.
Make use of fantasy heroes. Call upon your hero or idol in fantasy. Imagine meeting your hero. Imagine him/her appreciating your work. Imagine your hero facing creative blocks or procrastination. How would they handle these situations?
Join Me
I invite you to join me as I read Standing at Water’s Edge. You can purchase the book through Amazon, Dr. Paris’s web site, or perhaps find it at your local library or bookstore. My goal is to post every 7-10 days a summary of the chapter and share any a-ha moments that occurred. I welcome your comments on this and successive posts. Share your a-ha moments and experiences while reading the book. You can join in at any time. If you have a blog and are also writing about your experiences with this book, please include a link to your blog in your comment. I’ll include your blogs at the end of my posts.
Book Outline
Standing at Water’s Edge is divided into three parts with 10 chapters as follows:
Part 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 1: The Secret World of Creativity
Chapter 2: The Light and Dark of Immersion
Part II: Relationships
Chapter 3: The Need for Others
Chapter 4: Finding Strength in Mirrors
Chapter 5: Finding Inspiration in Heroes
Chapter 6: Finding Comfort in Twins
Chapter 7: Connecting with the Audience and Meeting Deadlines
Part III: Stages of the Creative Process
Chapter 8: Approaching Immersion
Chapter 9: Diving In
Chapter 10: Coping with Disengagement and Reentry
Musings from the Moonroom 