I am slowly returning to a relatively normal schedule now that I’ve finished the fall show season. All the preparations and other commitments that came along meant less time for blogging. I had to take a break from the computer; minimal blogging, staying off Twitter and other social networking for days at a time. You know what they say: “something has to give” and for me that meant the computer.
Thanks to everyone who sent well-wishes for my final holiday show, ArtSpace Maynard. It had been three years since I did this show. It was nice to re-connect with artists that I haven’t seen in a while and to meet new artists. Overall the show was fine. Ironically my overall sales were essentially unchanged from three years ago. I guess that means the show is consistent on some level.
Now I’m planning for 2010. Lindly Haunani’s Color Workshop inspired me to think about new color designs for my business card cases and perfume pens. Today I started working on a custom color palette using the color collage I created in the workshop.
My primary colors, seen at the bottom, are half zinc yellow & half cadmium yellow, cobalt blue, and 3/4 fuchsia & 1/4 cadmium red. I made mud from the primaries (top row, far left square) and then mixed 1/4 mud with each primary color, white, gold, black, pearl, translucent, ecru, silver, and copper. It was fun to see what new colors would be revealed.
I plan to explore a little more of the Dwellings themed work I started this spring. I have one form left from the original series that I never finished. I’d like to expand on this theme, perhaps creating up to 6 more pieces for a total of 10.
In preparation for my artist demo at the Tappan Z Gallery last month, I put together examples of foil and wire armatures. Using one of the demo pieces, I started a small sculpture that is telling me it would like to be considered for another series that focuses on healing. I’m not sure where this idea is going yet. I think the healing theme comes from one of the first pieces I made about 5 years ago for my brother-in-law.
Remember the Talking Stick art doll from a couple years ago? That is another theme I’d like to pursue further. And there are those lovely items I find at area consignment stores that I buy because they would make great art doll bodies. Maybe 2010 is the year for them to come to life.
While I have all these ideas in my head and ideas written down on paper, now that show season has ended and I have no immediate deadlines, I find myself hesitating to take action. This is not something new. I’ve done this before. I get grand ideas and tell myself things I want to do….and then I don’t do them. And then I’ll find myself bogged down in some other commitment with some other deadline and I’ll whine to myself that I don’t have any time to do that other stuff. That stuff I really wanted to do.
I think this comes from a place of fear. Fear that my ideas won’t turn out the way I hope and I might give up and deem myself a failure. Fear that they will turn out the way I want and bring success. Fear of simply starting and being open to where the piece takes me.
I wrote a journal entry on this topic and essentially told fear to take a hike. I don’t want to find myself stuck in the same old habit. I know habits take a while to change. So I’m taking baby steps with this one, working on one small goal a day toward these larger ideas. (Mixing the colors mentioned above is one of those small steps.)
And given the time of year I also have to remind myself that it is okay to take a little break, move a little slower, and to release over-developed expectations.
It is a sign of growth that I finally realized why I find myself stuck in this situation at this time of year. I also learned that I work better when I have some structure and deadlines to meet. The tricky part is holding myself accountable to the structure and deadlines.